With Thanksgiving just days away, dozens gathered Thursday evening, Nov. 20, at Temple Beth El to learn how to avoid the political landmines that can turn peaceful family dinners into battlegrounds.
The workshop, hosted by the nonprofit Braver Angels, drew attendees searching for strategies to navigate heated conversations. Among them was Russell Bogen, who said he often struggles.
“I feel I need more work on talking to people that I don't agree with,” Bogen said. “And also my neighbors, who I don't engage with because I'm not entirely sure they would be acceptable.”
Braver Angels leaders introduced the L-A-P-P technique, a four-step approach they say can help defuse tension. Alex Berg, co-chair of the group’s SWFL Alliance, described it as the cornerstone of their communication strategy.
The steps are simple: Listen to understand what someone is saying, acknowledge what you heard, pivot by asking to share your thoughts, and then offer your perspective. But even this method has limits. When a conversation isn’t going anywhere, Berg suggests there’s nothing wrong with calling a truce.
“Hey, it sounds like we’re not really going to be able to have a meeting of the minds here,” Berg tells participants to say. “And you know, we’re here for Thanksgiving. Let’s just park this conversation for later and go have some turkey.”
Sometimes one of the most effective ways to save Thanksgiving may be knowing when to let your point go — and let the potatoes go around.
WGCU is your trusted source for news and information in Southwest Florida. We are a nonprofit public service, and your support is more critical than ever. Keep public media strong and donate now. Thank you.